"Officially Missing You"

I just' cant sleep last night..I keep on thinking about her and missing her.I was so happy that i dreamed about her that we on a day trip to Pulau Redang. But time is short and i woke up on the next day..I Found that she is not beside me as i woke up, i felt the pain and the spear which goes through my heart. i keep on telling myself that she is beside me all the time, she just went to the toilet or to the kitchen. Am so silly, i need to accept the fact that its a dream.

Dreams come from creativity and our imaginary

At times it might comes true but those are mainly bad ones

I miss going for lunch with her for dimsum

Miss the song that we use to hear together

But everything just gone in seconds

*shed tears

"Its too late to apologize"

I begin to blog back. After reading all the past post posted in my inactive post,i have released how immature I am for the past. I read her blog and i realized many things around me. i felt so sweet and so touch. i shed my tears after reading the post.

This how we met:

We know each other in Poppy Garden on the 27th Nov 2009

There were a bunch of guys been surrounding her to dance with her,but she refused and say "No"

I was captivated and wanted to know her so much.

She was so tender and gentle.

I asked her for a dance and she said can.

This is how we start our friendship to relationship.

She who is the one who LOVES me so much

She hearts me so much

She sacrifices for me so much

She who cared and thinks about me all the time

She who can sense how I feel and what I am doing

She kissed me whenever we go

She hugged me tightly whenever we are

She sayang me so much

She likes to kiss my cheeks

She cares how i feel

She taught me about life and many meaning full thoughts

She patiently waits for me although she is hungry

She who does not care how i looks like

She hugged me when she is right beside me

She hugged me on the next morning

She says that she loves me and kissed me before she sleeps

She texted me whenever i'm out for classes

She waits for me whenever i'm out

She hugged me and kissed me before i goes out

She washed my jacket, i felt so touch

She will be there for me whenever i'm stressed and moody

She helps me out in my assignment

She who accompanied me to watch G.I Joe although she watched it already

She forgives me all the time

She bare with me and all the excuses that i gave

She who totally changed me a lot

She who called me baby, so touching

She who bought me a boxer

She who understands me from top to toe

She smells my body odour smell and she does not mind

She massage me whenever i'm tired and body aching

She praise me and makes me proud

She trusted me so much and ignore other people's saying

She support me all the time

She introduced her friends to me

She holds my hand when her friend around

She hugged me and kissed me in the public and although she is on work

She holds my hand when i'm busy driving and walking along the street

I felt so guilty and regret on what i have done to her.

I deeply hurt her

I cause her heartbroken all the time

I cause her to worried about me so much

I cause fights all the time

I make her shed tears for me

I was always make her hungry and causing her into pain and gastric attack

I'm always late and make her wait for hours

I being disobedience and ignore what she tells me

I felt that i'm worst than anyone

I can't even commit even a single commitment tat she ask for

1st: Not to be late

2nd: Do not let her hungry and thirsty

3rd: Do not smoke infront of her

*It is just a simple and small commitment and yet i can't do it*

I felt so useless and lifeless

I can't even provide her SECURENESS, COMFORT, LOVE AND CARE

*I'm such a failure*

I cause her deep pain

I felt so guilty that i yelled at her and push her

I felt so embarrassed to defense on what she said

I owe her too much and for the rest of the life

I couldn't repay for the rest of my life for what she did to me

I make use of her too much

I makes her feel unsecured at times

I make her feel moody and unhappy because of me

I miss the moment where we always visit Yuen Garden for dimsum in Puchong

She loves to eat char siew pao, and century egg dimsum

She does not like cold drinks

She loves milo kosong panas

She hates sun shine

She hates to come out in the noon

She hates waiting for people

She hates people who smokes in front of her

She hates people bugging her and stalking her

She loves to watch drama series and latest movie

She loves to hang out with her friends and bestie

She loves being pampered by me

She loves i make her smile and happy

She likes i joke around with her

i miss the moments where we have dinner in setapak and asia cafe

She began loves to eat creamy spaghetti just because of me

She began loves to eat pizza by Brava Pizza

I miss the moments we go eat Hokkien mee in setapak

I miss the moments where we go watch movie together

I miss clubbing with her in penang

I miss going out for meals in taiping

i miss her family and her grandmama

I miss her dog called "ah B"

I miss the moments where we go for a ride

I miss going around taiping with her

I miss the moments we go eat Sushi Zanmai

Although she is tiring but she accompany me and bare with me

She jump and hugged and kissed me after that

I'm waiting for her to come back to change bedsheet with me

I likes to smell the pillow that she slept on

I likes to hear to her rumblings when i grab her blanket in the middle of the night

Its too late to apologize and regret

I just want to accompany her and be there for her all the time

I want her to forgive me

I tempting for her love and care

If I could change the direction of the clock turning

I would change back to 25 of Dec 2010

I want to start all over again

I want to treat her all the best other people ever get

I want her to gain the LOVE and COMFORT being with me

I want her to feel secure and happy

I want to see her smile

Lastly, i have NO REGRET getting to know her, she is the special gift i ever had.

Thank God for hearing my words and blessing me all the time.

If i could have the chance I would like to ask for the last chance to fulfill all what i did this before

If i could have the chance the 1st thing I just want to Care and Love her

I want to hug her and kissed her desperately.

I Love You, May